Friday, August 31, 2012

Thou Shall be Judged

If you go against the norms,  people do resist. They may be Judgemental, They may even discriminate. 

If you are thin, if you are fat,
if you are short , if you are tall,
if you  are black or white or brown.
if you look different or act different
if you are a boy or a girl or both,

if you are a vegetarian or non vegetarian,
If you are working or stay at home spouse
if you have had a choice marraige or arranged...
if you are a parent or don't want kids


if you are a women or a man,
if you are happily married or happily not married.
If you are succesful, if you are not.
If you are one of the crowd
if you stand out on your own
if you dare to follow a different path...

my dear
you are going to be subjected to some nonsense at some point.

Was even Lord Krishna spared because of the color of his skin? They decided that Gods couldn’t be black, so they made him dark blue. It’s part and parcel of life. Before you think of yourself as a victim look at the other person, most probably he thinks himself as one too. This I have observed.

I have also observed something else, that it's never about the choice, but it's the person who judges. A meat eater doesnot judge a pure vegetarian because he is a meat eater, it's because he doesnot know he is not supposed to do that when he should.

Aha! See, I too have judged him now.

This exact example I take, because recently I have seen posts berating the attitude problem of meat eaters. I can swear I have gone through the same behaviour among vegetarians when they are the majority. It's always the person who stands out who is judged. It has nothing to do with the choice.

Why one discriminates??? I don’t know,

Maybe we feel threatened. Or maybe our bruised ego needs some mending this way.Maybe it's just previous resentment showing through. Maybe we just don’t know that we actually are discriminating.  That we actually  are hurting someone. Maybe the majority would stop discriminating if only they knew.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

The Ruskin Bond Children's Omnibus - Book Review

The Ruskin Bond Children's Omnibus
The Ruskin Bond Children's Omnibus by Ruskin Bond
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This is the first ever Ruskin Bond book I have read. And I wonder why I have not read any of his books till now. The omnibus had some of his short novels or novellas. I especially liked the Blue Umbrella- the story of the village girl who trades her lucky charm for a pretty blue umbrella from a tourist couple- the umbrella which makes her the envy of the whole village. Ruskin Bond writes simple stories, beautiful from an era I can only imagine. Maybe My father’s time- 1950's or 60's? Reminded me of my childhood. Remembered the time I stole guavas from Pathu uncle’s tree and him coming home to give me a whole bag of guavas after catching me, The time I climbed the tree near our home and made it my temporary home, the time the lady in the small shop in my native place kept 5 cylindrical fryams placed in all my fingers like extra-large ,salty and oily huge rings but strangely extremely tasty at that time.

The stories were very sweet and very simple. The language was simpler still. Do you know one important thing I realized when I was reading the story “the Blue Umbrella”? I was waiting for something to go wrong. I was so used to things always going wrong, that every time I turned a page, I expected something bad to happen. I realized how defensive we have become. It was a great lesson for me. It is a beautiful book. If you want to relax , if you want to go back to your childhood, if you want to go back to the simpler times, yes , this is the book for you. Really really recommend it to everyone. A perfect gift for a niece or nephew or your child.


View all my reviews

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

World is Still Beautiful 1

Sharing a good report from the newspaper "Hindu". These kind of reports makes me feel that whatever negative reports we may hear between two 'enemy' countries, normal people just want peace and harmony. Now that so many people are trying to incite hate this report was quite sweet to read.And seeing that positive reports are so hard to come by, I think I will just post the links of all positive news that I get to read from now on. Simple ones. Hope you will enjoy it too. Won't promise to be consistent but I will try...

And please read the comments too. Most of them are sweet. Especially the one from Mr. Mohan which tells us it's the same the other side of the border too.

Here is the link -

Indian doctors and students give Pakistani patient fresh lease of life

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

52 Weeks of Happiness - 1


OK, this is the first time I am linking to this project though I have been meaning to do it for a long long time. This project is Leigh's idea in which every week she finds something happy and records it by taking a photo. And is she not sweet to share it with us? It's good to find things to be happy about, no? More importantly it is good to recognize that there are so many things which make us happy. Infact I was extremely happy when I discovered Leigh's page. I was searching for something like this. You know that feeling when you search and search and search for something and then suddenly when you lose hope you find it unexpectedly and there is that overwhelming feeling in your heart of relief , of happiness. That's how I felt but I can't take a photo of that feeling so lets see what I can do about it.

So anyhow let me stop blabbering and come to the point....Introducing without further ado....the first photo of one of the things which makes me insanely happy.

1.Silvery Clouds


There is something about clouds that lift my heart... Nimbus clouds, fluffy clouds, pillow type clouds,stratus clouds,clouds of different shapes....  I and my friend Sabi used to cloud gaze when we were children and I guess subconsciously they are linked to happy times. But even among clouds, silvery clouds take the cake. They remind me of the stories of cloud elves whose job is to paint the silver lines on clouds.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Goal 64 - Mutton Biryani for Ramzan

Today is Eid. Technically Eid ul Fitr and Technically it finished when the moon rose today. But for years I have been calling it Ramzan. And this Eid,I did make Mutton Biryani. We had to take leave today as there was no official leave this year. There is something about holidays no. That itself makes one very happy.  It was a good Eid this year. Put Mehandi also this time. Here is a photo. Don't you feel like having some???


Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Moving Star

Today I and hubby were on the terrace star gazing and talking when we noticed a moving star. I specifically say moving star becasue it was definitely not a plane. It felt as if it was as far as the stars were and the size of a normal star too. It was not even blinking. We saw it move some 5m scaled from our view and then it disappeared. It appeared and disappeared. Hubby says it might have been a satellite. Apparently people have seen Sputnik when it moves in a particular latitude or longitude or something. Anyhow was weird. I didn't see any shooting stars though. I really want to see one. I did see a flash of light but I am not sure if it was a shooting star. Anyhow the incident was weird enough for me to record it here. We had a clear enough sky today and we have bought a big mat in which both can lie and watch stars. When will I buy a telescope.Sign!!!!

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Leaving Facebook and a bit of other stuff


Note:  More a mail than a blog post  :)
Hello, sorry for not writing for so long. Was not well last week. Right now life is quite mundane and I am struggling to find anything to write about. I wish I could write about certain characters in my life who entertain me with their antics sometimes. I could really write about SS - the Neighbor aunty and DM - the draftsman I work with. Actually SS is quite an important part of my life and I doubt if I would ever forget her and believe me, I could write a book about her. She taught me what kind of a neighbor one should not be.
DM used to frustrate the hell out of me to an extent that in the end our dealings had become extremely funny. Now, I have learnt to deal with his idiosyncrasies and he has learnt to deal with me as well. I have a good relationship with him now though sometimes he makes me clutch my hair and see red too.
 Rt now, he works with Juniors…
Yoo-hoo,it feels good to become seniors. After three years of being the youngest in the office, it really feels good to have people younger and less experienced than you. Though I must admit, workload has reduced a bit which I am not totally comfortable with. I love having loads of work. An Idle mind is a devil’s workshop, and with an overactive mind like mine, I would rather be fully occupied.
Here recent news is that, I have left Facebook, for now at least. A month ago, i suddenly realized that I had an over load of information. I do have a brain like a sponge (for certain things, especially info of loved ones). And I found that I knew more about my hubby’s family, and friends, than himself. The full impact of this realization hit me when I found that I knew my grand aunt in law’s birthday and my BIL who lives 5 minutes from them did not. I had this overload of info about everyone, people I have not met in years and people I may not meet in future and god knows their friends as well.
And worse of all, I realized that the keeping “in touch with friends”, at least for me, was deceptive. I felt we thought we were in touch with friends but actually we were not. I knew everything of everyone (At least what they posted online) but I did not have a single phone number, I was not comfortable enough to call and say, ‘hey girl, howz life’. How sad is that!!! I suddenly realized I would rather have 20 friends than 200 but those 20 should be someone I could call. I could feel an emotional connection towards them. At that point I felt I was coming out of an illusion.
There were other more important reasons too. I will tell you another thought which crossed my mind. I have a ‘friend’ who is originally the friend of a friend(don't we all have those). We meet sometimes, he calls up, nice guy, and all was fine until we became ‘friends’ in facebook. He was quite active in Facebook and his feeds used to come frequently. The problem was, looking at  the stuff he “liked” I realized that our wavelengths not only do not match, but also move in opposite directions.  Let me give you a small example.
One thing he “liked” was an “I love my India” poster. What’s the big deal you might ask? The big deal was, the poster was of two soldiers – one of India and One of its neighboring country (3 guesses which one). The Indian Soldier was shielding a family from terrorists and the soldier from the other country was killing a family he was supposed to protect. I did not like it one bit(Need I elabarote why???). And I did not like the mentality which prompted him to “like” such a pic.  Every time I talked to him after that I remembered this and other things he had "liked". And yes, I judged him. And I wondered if I wanted to be friends with him at all.
I am not a saint and I am not Zen. I have not yet conquered myself that I can stop myself from judging anybody. But I don’t want to think negative. I don’t want to think bad about others. I may meet him only once in 6 months. I may talk to him maybe 20 sentences in a year. Why should I poison my mind with such thoughts and that too thoughts which have no significance in our relationship? I have not yet learned to control the feelings that such information invokes in me so I might as well cut the source of unnecessary info until I do learn. Sometimes, Ignorance Is bliss. There is enough good Vs evil fights going on in our minds, why invite more unnecessarily, no?
Our mind is filled with too much clutter nowadays. I am on a de - cluttering spree… For now I am out of Facebook. If one is not enjoying it, what’s the point of having an account huh!
I know, One can regulate stuff in facebook ,block in such a way that nobody knows they are being avoided, blocked or so on.... But this is what I choose now. And the way it has been going , I don’t regret it.
 Have started reading again in all the free time I am getting now. Hubby bought me DC Comics Batman series Chronicals – Vol I. loved it. I want to read the Phantom Series too but unfortunately I am not able to find the old ones in stores. Have started reading Ruskin Bond’s Omnibus for children. I can see why people like his stories so much. But more about it in another post :)
What’s up at your end???

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Friendship


I wanted to write a nice mushy post on friendship day about the most beautiful friendship I have…… with my husband, all about our time together for the last 10 years from how we met, how we became friends and everything…. But I am sick, and I am almost bed ridden and I am tired. And he has been taking care of me with utmost devotion. My pal My friend, my husband.



Happy Friendship day everyone…

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Tables Turned

It’s weird how each and every one of my friends are recent proud parents of girls. Every one of them. It's as if Nature is trying to balance the ratio. Of all the female feticides going on she is making sure all the others are having girls. But the question is will their mates have the same kind of parents. Ok totally judgmental I know. But it's weird. Around 5 -10 people. All Girls. Now I have no problem with girls of course, I being one but sometimes I wonder, is something going on under the surface which we don't know about!!!! Where are all the baby boys???

Talking about girls, something happened this time I went home. So Amma had an operation and I was there to take care of her. We had just finished breakfast and I was taking some rest before starting lunch when suddenly my mom who was in deep thought suddenly said " rahmath, You should take care of your MIL very very well".  "Obviously amma, I will take care of her. But what made you say this suddenly out of the blue" I said

"Poor lady, she has only sons. She does not have any daughters"

I started laughing out loud. My My, How did this happen??? For years and years of hearing how unfortunate women with girl children are, I suddenly hear, from my mother (who has heard it so many times too and somewhere deep in my heart  I wonder sometimes whether she believed those idiots who told her that…hmmmm I digress where was I?, ya I suddenly hear, from my mother ) that it's unfortunate that someone has only sons!!!!

"This is something that I never thought you would say. How did your analysis change suddenly? I asked.

"I have seen so many cases. In the end, it is only the daughters who are there. Sons are not. You should take care of her well. That's all “she said.

I assured her I will though I also made sure she knew that my MIl and FIL, had brought up their sons well and that no they didnot need to depend on their DIL's to take care of them. Their sons would do that quite well without the help of their wives. Still, I promised her I would. (Guys, you must not get angry with my mom for saying this. We are what we experience in our lives. Her recent experience was such)

But for some one like me, who has heard the dialogue "'only girls, so sad' or 'oh, no boy? ' " 'oh nowadays girls are equal to boys, so it’s ok' said in that condescending tone" some100 times, well this was a sweet revelation from my mom (even if it's not entirely true.)

How the tables have turned!!!