Saturday, August 24, 2013

How's motherhood?

A question which everyone asks me nowadays - being a new mom.

When they laid him besides me in the crook of my arm close to my chest fully covered with just his face and a tiny hand visible, I felt peace. I felt content. I was overjoyed when his fingers resembles mine , when I saw his shapely nails.He was beautiful. I was content. That's the feeling I have. A contented, a satisfied, a peaceful feeling....something which was as soft as a baby pink rose.

There were too many things in my mind the first few weeks so I was not really able to enjoy my motherhood as much as I would have liked but every time he would be close to my heart feeding and every time he had his fill  I felt a joy. He had his share of crying.... oh a lot..... but  sometimes it gave me a guilty pleasure when he would be calm once he came to my hands. The power of being a mother , the power of that connection .....I cannot describe. A filling feeling? I don't know.Though now he shares that connection with his daddy too.

I wont say that he has given me a new found purpose or that he has changed my life drastically . He has not. To tell the truth I feel as if he was always there. A lot has changed still it feels as if nothing has. Everything feels the same. As if he was always there.