Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Reminder for first time moms about wearing new clothes for the next

5 years????

Always cut the tags before you wear them for going out. Don't go searching for the scissors after wearing the clothes. Most probably by the time you reach the counter where the scissors are kept, your husband will ask for something, your son might cry, you may be thinking about his milk, food and n other things, you may suddenly remember that there is this thing to be done before leaving for outside.....

You know what will happen then???

You will go to the mall, feeling very happy about your new clothes. You may admire the way you look in every mirror or glass. You may see people smiling and if you are like my husband, you may wonder why they are smiling or if you are like me you may smile happily back, thinking nothing of it except that how wonderful people are to smile at strangers. And then suddenly when you are finalizing something in a shop, your husband may suddenly see the some 3 tags hanging outside your tunic and come and tuck it inside. and you may go like..."Oh My Goodness". After 5 min, you may realize that it no big deal but for that 5 minutes you will be like..."oooooooooooooooh, so thats why that lady was smiling....."

Why go through all this???. One time is enough no?

Next time.... cut cut.... before wear wear. OK?

Monday, April 28, 2014

12:09 to 12:36

Time : 12:09 am
State of mind: Tired. I want to sleep. But I want to blog too.
What I did today?
Lots, cleaned, cooked a good meal, got half rid of some clutter but most of all bought my first sleeveless top.

And why that's a big deal?

Will tell you.

I have never been interested in clothes. I am a bored shopper. I get nauseous when I have too many options. I literally run away when one has to buy jewellery. The only time I was interested in clothes was maybe when I was some 8 or 9. My friend had a beautiful sleevelss frock. And  I wanted one too. I asked my mom. She refused. Strict ideas of dressing and all that. After that maybe I was molded that way, I never cared while growing up. If at all I cared about dresses, it would be just a phase. I think I was more about having the freedom to dress the way you want (which I didn't have) than the actual dressing. I used to put eyeliner, mascara, but I always felt it to be a head ache. I don't think I dressed shabbily, but more than once friends have asked me to dress a bit more you know....I am petty comfortable wearing the same thing for the shopping market/wedding.

It worked pretty well for me till some two months ago. The people who loved me knew me. And then they got scattered. Around two month ago something came around our present circle which made me feel as if .....well I don't know how to explain. I have always admired people who could spend so much time for themselves. Really, that requires commitment. I know cause I don't have it. but I guess maybe I was dismissive also somewhere. A chance comment in a judgmental tone, hurt my ego and it made me write a post. I was careful not to show the hurt but in the end the judgmental me did come forward. And after that I felt bad. I try not to be judgmental.  I wondered whether it was a case of sour grapes as these people thought. I have never even tried to dress differently. How do I know whether I like it or not? Maybe I cant wear them. Maybe I AM very self conscious. Maybe. I don't know. I have never tried.

So this year I found my resolution. I am going to try new dressings, new styles, makeup, I am going to try things which I never did because I did not think they were worth the effort (Society , elder 's thoughts, Image and all that. Why cross them for something which is not even important to one??? That was my reasoning). When the year ends, I will decide whether I want to continue or that the experiment should become a part of my life. It's been two months and frankly speaking, though I have started using products more frequently,bought two extra pairs of footwear which btw hurt my heels( I firmly believed one pair serve all purposes. now I have five or six. I did have two extra pairs earlier which I rarely used, Had bought them during one of my phases!), scouring shops for tops,tunics, following fashion blogs.... I am still not into it. I do it and I try to do it well, but it still has not come from the heart.

Lets see....

I wonder if I will last the year.

Hearing Elvis Presly. Never heard him before. God! how come? I wonder now.
What a voice...
Time 12:36am.

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Random Thoughts

The time is 8:01 right now. We went out to the market but then remembered that the cook might come anytime now, so I returned home with the mangoes that we had bought. I am not going to blog, if I wait for a topic. So I decided today that I will just write randomly about anything that comes to my mind for 15 mintues.

Hubby came back for the baby carrier. Had to go and open the door for him. A bit of chit chat and the time is 8:06. I wish the break had not come. I was in a flow. I cannot write when Aman is at home. His dad is singing him to sleep right now. I wonder if he will. He seems to survive with very little sleep. He is too excited most of the times.

We removed his first hair today. He cried, but the barber was a good one. Young but gentle. I don't know why we were worried so much. It easier to give him a hair cut than to nebulize him. It positively breaks our heart everytime we have to nebulize him. Somethings are so overrated. The way people talked, I thought his first hair cut would be a big thing.

It's been a while now, I am beginning to feel as if we don't belong here. Our principles don't match with the majority of the people here. Somewhere in our mind I have started wondering, maybe we should ....maybe the western country is the place for us. But there is no motivation to try abroad. People ask. Why not go here? Why not try there? We are happy here. I don't want to leave the country but somewhere I feel, it's getting difficult to fit in here.

I want my child to have strict ideas of freedom, of individuality, of respect to others whatever gender, religion or color they may be. I don't want him to be a hypocrite. I am afraid people might teach him nonsense about traditions and cultures as if we are the only ones having it. I am a women in India. Don't talk about culture to me.

We see what we want to see. I love my country but it has its faults. Lets correct ourselves instead of pointing to the exaggerated faults of others. Love if blind, is of no use. I get irritated with the Bharat mahan advertisements which come in the radio. They keep on talking about what happened centuries ago. Talk about what is happening now. You are proud to be an Indian? Don't pee on road sides. Close the open pipes in the side of the road. Respect your heritage. Don't write" Kartick Loves Suman" in every **** building.

It's 8:19


Love Rahmath


There was this story I read in which the story teller's friend is an artist. They were good friends during their college. On their way back from a trip, they are assaulted. While the story teller manages to escape , her friend is raped. The friend goes into depression after that and leaves the place. After many many years this story teller gets to know that her friend has become a renowned artist and that there is an exhibition of her paintings throughout her career. So she goes to see it. She sees colourful paintings then suddenly extremely grey ones. Dark ones.... It coincided with the time her freind had left college. It continued for many paintings and then slowly color began to come ..... Her most recent paintings were colourful and happy. The story teller understood that her friend had found happiness once again.

This story had an impact on me. I loved it.

Sometimes I wonder if my blog is like the friend's paintings. Whether the transitions of my state of mind would be visible to one who cared to see? Sometimes I wonder if I am true in my posts. I know I am not. If I am frustrated I don't write, If I am hurting I don't write. If I am  angry, I dont write.

Still , would it be possible for the reader to read between the lines correctly and find out broadly what I might be going through? Sometimes I wonder...

Friday, April 11, 2014

Withdrawing from the challenge :(

I am officially withdrawing myself from the A to Z challenge. Simple reason . I am not getting time. There are some things going on here , some changes.... It takes commitment to write something and unfortunately I don't have that kind of a commitment now.

 Will be blogging but how frequently, God only knows.

Saturday, April 5, 2014

E for Education

What's true education?

Today we had to go out for something and entered a road where the traffic was very slow moving. We had to go to the right side and my husband signaled to the guy to not come forward so that he could take  a right turn. Vehicles were queuing behind us too. The lane was not fast moving and all he had to do was stop for say, 5 seconds. Was that guy educated? yes. Did he stop? No. Then there was another car and my husband signaled once again. Did that guy see? Yes? Did he stop? No. The funny thing is they had no where to go. That lane was that slow moving.  Was he educated?
He looked educated.

Ultimately the third vehicle stopped. It was driven by a lady and she looked of a different nationality. 
I thanked her. She pretended she didn't see me. I think she didn't know how to react as for her,she had done nothing out of the normal. I felt she was embarrassed. Sometimes I feel 90% of the traffic jams here are caused because of senselessness. 
Isn't it unfortunate?

What are our schools teaching us?

Have we forgotten what education means?

Does education mean just having a degree and learning to do something which makes money. Or does it mean to teach people the basic values of life which will help us grow as a society?

Disclaimer: There are truly educated people too. Have met them though the percentage is very less. My husband is one of them. And it's unfortunate that I am proud of that. It should be something that should be taken for granted.

Friday, April 4, 2014

D for Dumbledore Quotes

OK. Technically they are J K Rowling quotes but I would associate it with Dumbledore because she used him to present it to us ok . I love him. Maybe I will do a post on why I love him sometime.

But here are some Quotes which I carry close to my heart.

1. It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to stand up to your friends.
2.Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it.
3. Its our choices that show what we truly are far more than our abilities.
4. It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.
5. We must all make the choice between what is right and what is easy.
6. Really Hagrid, If you are holding out for universal popularity,I'm afraid you will be in this cabin for a very long time.

by the way ... 6th is my favorite.
Do you have any favorite Dumbledore quote?

Thursday, April 3, 2014

C for Clock talks

 Silly Girl, there she closes her eyes again. Poor alarm. How many times does he have to ring?. Can't she see me well and proper? I do wish she got up a bit early. I hate it when she looks at me with worry. When she gets late, she looks at me with such an expression, you would think I am the one running deliberately fast. How can I stop?
I don't stop.
I go in the exact speed that I am supposed to go.
She has kept me 5 minutes fast. 
I hate that; I hate that; I hate that.
Why make me show the wrong time?
Of course I do what she wants but how does it make sense? Doesn't her mind know that she has kept me five minutes fast. Who is she trying to fool????

Sometimes she looks at me as if I am deliberatly slow. Dearest, I know you want your hubby to come soon. I know your hubby comes at 6:10.... but sweet heart, again I don't go fast or slow. Don't look at me with such exasperation.

Goodness it's 7:15...Wake up Wake up....where is that Alarm?
There she is snoozing him again....
Oh she is looking at me...
OH oh... her face registers a shock...
Thank GOD...She is jumping up.... 

Oh Rahmath, when will you ever learn???

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

B for Bottle Sterilizer

One of the best gifts ever to give to a new mom.

I and my son got a lot of gifts after he was born and after 10 months, I have a better idea as to how useful
certain gifts can be and how a bit of thoughtfulness goes a long way.

I would have never bought a bottle sterilizer. I had seen it before in a shop but hearing the cost decided that it was not worthwhile. I had thought wrong.

Before the sterilizer,every evening after I came home, I would wash the bottles and then boil water for sterilizing them. I didn't have a big enough vessel, so I had to do it 2 at a time. Then I had to sterilize the holder for removing the bottle from the hot water and then the bowl in which I kept the sterilized bottles. Of course the holders are not designed to handle curved bottles and accessories. Once or twice they would slip back in to the boiling water, scalding my hands. Once the charade was over, I had to throw away a good deal of boiled water which always, always made me feel sad.

And then V ma’am gave me the bottle sterilizer.

It's so easy to use. All you have to do is, wash the bottles and other baby utensils which can be sterilized, pour 90ml water inside the sterilizer; on the equipment and tadaa....they are sterilized. Even though the instructions say 5 minutes it takes a good 20-30 minutes but it doesn't matter because, are spending that time with your baby and not his/her bottle.

Another thing I like about the sterilizer is that, only 90ml water is used and it is used efficiently. I used to always wonder if the bottles were boiled enough but steam sterilization removes these kind of doubts.
It definitely made my life so much easier.

So if you are thinking of getting a new mom a gift, this is a good option. If it is a bit costly I suggest pool in with others and get her something useful which if required, she can do without. Note the point "do without".  Seeing the expenditure on the arrival of a new baby, most probably new moms think she can do without it.That's the normal mentality. She will not buy such a thing which will make her life easy. I don't know why they do that but they do. So get it for her. She WILL thank you.

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

A for America


I have visited only two countries outside of mine, and one of them is America. Of course we just went to Washington DC and that must be like people visiting the city of Delhi and saying they visited India. I fully realize that the colors of America maybe as vibrant as the rainbow, maybe even more so but here are some thoughts then I have with me from that visit. I saw Virginia, New York and Atlantic City also.

1. I have seen how proud Americans are of their country, well... it is justified.
2. I loved the way they had displayed their flags almost everywhere. At that time not everyone in India could hoist the Indian flag. It would be safe to say at that time I saw Indian flags more in America than in India. I liked it.
3. Pleasant people overall. Of course I met some grouchy ones also, but then the pleasant people were more. In fact I was not used to smiling at strangers and was extremely bashful when someone said" hey good morning" that I could not even stammer back.
4. I could not but compare the way they showcased their history. Compared to India, The USA's history is lesser but they had showed it superbly. I felt  sad about the wonderful archeological treasures we had in India which was not well preserved.
5. The roads were very clean.
6. The portions of food were very very large. Two of us struggled with one portion of food in the diners.
7. The desserts were extremely rich.
8. Hygiene was pretty much same in public toilets as compared to India I live nowadays (I mean Urban India). That's what I felt. I had a tough time adjusting with using just toilet paper. I do want water.
9. Anyone who is a bit modern in dressing here in India is criticized - "hey this is not America." Well true. In America, the people I saw wore baggy shorts and baggy T shirts.
10. I fell in Love with Ceaser's Salad